Sunday, 21 October 2012

Thanks - I quit

Sometimes it all just seems a bit too much... or a bit too hard.

One of my favourite self-helpy type guru (hate that word) people, Martha Beck has a philosophy that I find interesting. She's a bit fan of horse-whispering (I'm sure my close friends will have heard me blather on about this while they glazed over blah blah blah - horse whispering... blah blah blah self help).

The theory is that you show the horse your intention, watch it carefully but not directly while all the time still continuing to give it body language that you want to join up with it.... the horse will also show that it's ready by chewing and other things... but the crucial step is once the horse seems ready... you turn your back and walk away and the horse will come to you.

This is something I have a problem with. I want to make things happen... to manage them and force them and it just doesn't work that way. You can only do what you can and then you just have to let that sucker go... and let the chips fall where they may.

This is terrifying to a control freak like me, but in my life nothing has ever worked when I've tried to make it go my way. You can't be passive or put in no effort either but you just have to be consistent and not worry about the outcome. Even if you get no feedback (which is the hardest thing... this weekend we played a gig to about 3 people... it felt like that but in the end I just thought - I quit - I can't make this better, I can't make this fuller, I in fact can't do shit except my job... when I finally did that everything was ok.)

So this post is just a little letter to me to remind me that sometimes you just have gently coax things along and then walk away and the solutions will come to you.

Below is Monty Roberts taking a horse from nothing to saddle and rider in something like 30 minutes...

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